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THIS IS A GUIDE TO CORPUS, THE MOST BROKEN, BALLEST GOAT IN THE GAME. HIS ACHIEVEMENTS INCLUDE BEING THE PATRON OF THE LONG QUA DYNASTY, BEING THE MOST BADASS GOAT THE WORLD'S EVER SEEN AND BEING DOWNRIGHT SWAG. NOTHING ELSE, NOT EVEN THE GREAT CATHERINE HAS ANYTHING ON THIS GUY, OKAY? LET'S GO
STARTING ITEMS Top
THAT'S ALL YOU NEED. CORPUS DOES NOT NEED POTIONS. CORPUS DOES NOT NEED FLARES. CORPUS IS LOVE, CORPUS IS LIFE AND YOU ARE CORPUS. YOU DESTROY EARLY GAME. YOU ARE A GOD. GORDON RAMSAY WON'T BE ABLE TO BUTCHER YOU FOR BECAUSE THAT'S HOW BALLER-ISH YOU ARE. YOU ARE CORPUS. NEVER FORGET.
CORPUS IS A NEW CHARACTER. YOU ARE IN DOUBT. YOU DO NOT KNOW HOW TO PLAY HIM. YOU TURN TO VG FOR GUIDES BUT EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM DOES NOT TELL YOU HOW TO BRING OUT YOUR TRUE NATURE OF ABSOLUTE GODLIKE STATUS. SO WHAT DO YOU DO? YOU ASK CORPUS. REMEMBER, CORPUS IS GOD. HE IS EVERYTHING. AND WHAT DOES CORPUS SAY?
"GO YOURSELF"
THAT'S RIGHT, YOU LITTLE *****. YOU AIN'T NEARLY HARDY ENOUGH TO TAKE ON THE GOD THAT IS CORPUS. SO YOU PRACTICE. YOU PRACTICE TILL YOU ACHIEVE A FRACTION OF HIS GODLY BEING. AND THEN FINALLY HE GIVES YOU ADVICE.
"SAVE YOUR ALLIES SO THAT THEY CAN THANK YOU AND LOOK LIKE LITTLE *****ES."
THIS IS DEEP, CONFUCIOUS-STYLE PHILOSOPHY RIGHT HERE YOU GUYS. SO WHAT DO YOU DO? BUY FOUNTAIN. SAVE THOSE PATHETIC ALLIES OF YOURS. BUT DO NOT FORGET. YOU ARE CORPUS. YOU ARE A ONE MAN ARMY. YOU KILL THEM ALL. THEY ARE NOT ALLIES. THEY ARE MERELY UNBELIEVERS THAT HAPPENED TO WITNESS YOUR GLORY. YOU ARE CORPUS.
LIKE REALLY LATER Top
YOUR WORST ENEMY Top
OK SO THIS. I SAID HE WAS HARMLESS EARLIER RIGHT? NO. THIS GUY IS A COMPLETE. HE KNOWS HOW TO ROAST YOUR FIFTY WAYS. SO BEST COURSE OF ACTION? KEEP A POSITIVE MENTAL ATTITUDE AND AFK. YOUR TEAMMATES WILL BE ENRAGED AT FIRST, BUT THEY WILL REALIZE THAT CORPUS WORKS IN MYSTERIOUS WAYS AND YOU ARE PUSHING THEM TO DO BETTER AND YOU WILL WIN THE GAME.
CLOSURE Top
OKAY A QUALITY GUIDE DESERVES A QUALITY ENDING RIGHT? SO LET'S GET STARTED.
ONE: HAPPY FOOLS' DAY. NO IM KIDDING YOU WHO D'YOU THINK YOU'RE TALKING TO
TWO:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dQw4w9WgXcQ
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